Childhood emotional abuse doesn't often get the attention it deserves. It gets less attention than, say, physical abuse or sexual abuse or even PTSD. Yet it can be just as damaging (if not more so) as the other types of abuse, and is more closely related to PTSD than you might realize.
Because of the way memories are stored and retrieved in our brains, anything that even vaguely reminds us of something in our past-any picture, sound, smell, emotion, thought, or physical sensation that resembles what happened-can bring back the entire experience of that memory. Painful past experiences that have no real relation, just a perceived similarity, to present events can continue to control our behavior.
This is not unlike the way people become affected by post-traumatic stress disorder. PTSD is an anxiety disorder resulting from a traumatic event, most often combat, physical assault, or natural disaster. With PTSD, the traumatized person develops a heightened startle response and mood changes. PTSD victims are vulnerable to flashbacks, which are essentially overpowering memories of the traumatic event coming back at unexpected moments.
PTSD victims will also try to avoid thinking about the event; if you know anyone with the disorder, you've undoubtedly noticed that they're reluctant to talk about what happened. The "hidden" aspect of their suffering makes it worse, and all of this makes it difficult for a PTSD sufferer to function normally in normal life situations.
Granted, it might be a bit disrespectful of PTSD sufferers to suggest that, say, being yelled at and called names as a child is equivalent to being raped or seeing your comrades maimed and killed in battle. Still, the process is similar: in both cases, the change is biological and relatively permanent.
Adult survivors of childhood emotional abuse have a huge collection of painful memories that can be triggered by ordinary events. People say things or do things that get interpreted as personal attacks, no matter how far off the mark that interpretation may be. So, in a self-perpetuating cycle of false "selfhood," the survivor of childhood emotional abuse will behave in ways that get others to treat them in a way that matches their distorted self-image.
Dr. Wayne Dyer, in The Power of Intention-Learning to Co-Create Your World Your Way, calls this a "maxim for life": "You get treated in life the way you teach people to treat you."
Do you see yourself or someone you know in this? If so, help is available.
Lisa J. Lehr is a writer, copywriter, and Internet marketer specializing in alternative health, pet care, and self-help. She holds a degree in Biology and is interested in the study of the human brain and how it controls our behavior.
Visit http://helpineedahug.com to download a free report entitled "A Hug: the Miracle Drug" and opt in for empowering weekly messages. An e-book to help the adult survivor of childhood emotional abuse recover his or her self-esteem is available for purchase.
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